Today’s story is about one couple’s journey through infertility from a good friend of mine, Brittany. She and I were music education majors in the same studio at Baylor University (Sic ’em Bears!). Brittany is an elementary music teacher, is married to her husband, Garrett, of 7 years, and momma to her five month old daughter, Maela. Brittany has a beautiful heart, is super funny (without trying to be), and absolutely loves the Lord! I have always looked up to how strong her relationship is with the Lord. I pray their Garrett and Brittany’s story gives you encouragement and hope if you are walking through infertility.
Garrett and I met when we were in 6th and 7th grade at our summer church camp. We were best friends and had so many fun, sad, exciting, and fun memories from all the years of growing up together. Dating each other started during my senior year of college and we got married shortly after my first year of teaching. We both have huge families and were excited about starting our family together!
After a couple of job changes, Garrett’s master’s degree, and a house, we were fervently praying for the Lord to bless us with children. We felt we were ready, prepared, and had everything lined up to be the perfect parents. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding” Proverbs 3:5 became one of my daily prayers.
Days, weeks, months, and finally the years started to fly by and we were not getting pregnant. Our doctors were wonderful. They were confident that there was “nothing wrong” with either of us, having a baby was just a miracle and it was not yet our time. We were frustrated, losing hope, and starting to want to take things into our own hands. After visiting with some friends, we started to pray a different prayer. “Lord help us to not be anxious but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” Philippians 4:6 “Teach us how to wait in your presence and wait with obedient hearts.” We had a purpose but it was not yet revealed to us in a way we could see.
June of 2017, we had now been married 6 years, had our finances in check and a crib sitting in the attic. With no baby in sight, we took the advice of our wonderful doctor and were prepared to do two rounds of Clomid. We did our first round in May, both May and June flew by with no baby. We did another round in July and were so excited that we had a positive pregnancy test at the end of that month. We were FILLED WITH JOY and were so excited to tell everyone! My doctor was diligent in letting us know everything we needed to know about keeping mom and baby healthy and growing. I felt great and we were over the moon happy.
At our 10-week appointment, I can still remember how the cold dark room felt. When the doctor took my hand and said, “There is no heartbeat. I am going to give you a few minutes to breathe and I will be back to talk to you about a few options.” I can remember how the warm tears felt rolling down my face and how I cried in my husband’s arms. Why us, why me, why him, this isn’t fair, we would be such great parents, we have a crib, we have a savings account, we are faithful stewards of your word Lord, why?
The next few days were hard. Not having answers to questions was hard. I had a miscarriage. I did not know anyone that had one. I did not know to even expect that might be an outcome of a positive pregnancy test. Do 1 and 4 women really have one of these? How have I never met anyone that had one! Why are we so quiet about this loss? We had a D&C and waited 3 cycles before we started trying again.
We felt defeated! Nothing was adding up. We were doing “everything right”.
The Lord taught us so much in those couple of months. Taught us how to wait, love, and he humbled us with how powerless we truly are. We had so many people praying for us! We kept coming back to this verse, “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” James 5:16
In February, I was late! I was not getting my hopes up though! I left for a music convention and took a pregnancy test before I left for Garrett to see the outcome. Well, it was positive! We were so excited but very cautious this go round. We told our prayer warriors and prayed for this unborn child that the Lord had gifted to us.
Maela was due October 25 and joined us on November 1st! We waited 7 years for her, 7 extra days in the womb and 7 more days after her birthday to take her home from the NICU. She is a blessing to everyone she meets. She is our greatest joy and we could not have planned her presence better than the Lord could!
We learned how to have patience, trust, and love in the Lord. We learned how special a child is and how special it is to be parents! “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” Romans 15:13
With hope and healing,
Brittany
Visit Resolve: The National Infertility Association to find information and support groups for infertility. You are not alone.
You will not have to fight this battle. Take up your positions; stand firm and see the deliverance the Lord will give you, Judah and Jerusalem. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Go out to face them tomorrow, and the Lord will be with you. -2Chronicles 20:17 (NIV)
Postpartum Support International Help Line: 1-800-944-4773 (Non Emergencies)
Postpartum Support International Support Coordinators
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255
Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741
My Beloved 